Tuesday, January 12, 2010

TWD:Scherben, Shmerben

Looking back on it now, it seems clear that I was destined to not like these "scherbens," IF that's their real name, from the start.

Exhibit A: their name, which I cannot say without developing a ridiculous German accent.

Exhibit B: the fact that they are, actually, German, and it is a documented fact that I do not like German desserts. See also kugelhopf, or as I like to call it, "frustratinghopf."

Exhibit C: I don't generally like fried foods. The last time I fried something was two years ago, when I made these deep-fried candy bars. (Nothing says "I hate you, heart" like a deep-fried candy bar.) And it's taken me this long to recover from the experience of using all that oil to cook something.


Well, I guess I'm a slow learner, because I fried my little heart out this weekend, and all I have to show for it are these sugar-dusted cardboard shards.

Maybe it's me. Maybe I didn't roll the dough thin enough, or have the oil at the right temperature, or maybe it's my subconscious prejudice against the German people and their fine, fine baked goods. But these...these were not gut.

Immediately after frying, once they'd gotten their initial sprinkling of sugar and cinnamon, they were okay. A bit bland, but crispy and fairly sugary. However, after sitting out for an hour or two, they were stale. Like, I did a spit-take into the trash can stale. Like, I couldn't believe that our mild-mannered apartment air could have such a horrible, near-instant effect on a dessert. Blech! At least they looked good:

In the interest of trying to at least pretend to be healthy, I baked some of of these scherbens (is that the plural?) instead of frying them, at the suggestion of the brilliant Caitlin. Well, it worked for her, but I was underwhelmed with the results. These bowls have the exact same number of scherben in them:

Yeah, I guess the oil is a necessary evil in this case. Ah well. I have had some medicinal chocolate to help me recover, and have bid a final auf wiedersehen to these scherben. Please remind me of this experience next time I want to make deep-fried Bavarian dessert pretzels or something.

13 comments:

  1. Okay, they weren't a favorite, but your pictures are wonderful. At least you tried.

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  2. Medicinal chocolate will always cure the scherben blues or any blues for that matter!

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  3. yeah they didn't work for me either (and I like german desserts). oh well, maybe it's better to not like the deep fried desserts!

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  4. Great post. I had the same feeling about the scherben. Better luck next week.

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  5. you couldn've fooled me with your great pictures!

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  6. Ha ha - if anyone would tell it like it was, I knew it would be you. I'm so glad I skipped these.

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  7. They look pretty. I can't stand fried things in oil..makes me sick!

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  8. Hilarious post! They sure do look good, though:)
    They weren't my all-time favourites, but i thought they were okay, and I ate more than I intended too.

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  9. They picture perfect! It might be a guy thing, my son loved these and the girls thought they were so-so. Interesting thing is I don't have any left over.
    Mimi

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  10. But yours are so perfect! Appearances can be deceiving, yes? My house smelled truly bad after frying these. I don't do fried food so I was unprepared for the lovely eau d'canola that they left behind.

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  11. Yow do you say BUMMER!! in German?? Sorry these weren't your thing. Reminded me a little of beignets, but just a little.

    Good with LOTS of sugar.

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  12. Anonymous8:46 AM

    Well they look very pretty in the photos! I'd pick German desserts over other German food, but I agree that none of it is that great.

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  13. Sorry you didn't like these. They sure look good though!

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